If all I had was a story,
I have story
But I have be constraint to be silence and say I'm sorry
Wearing pretense as an amour, walking down this aisle in shame of glory
Blurry with an army of delusion that he would be a better man.
My family packaged and folded me like stalled agege bread woven into an ancient relic sold away for cheap societal honour and glory, saying,
“Just break the curse ,the chain and let us answer our “daughter is married “

Now Married and Marred am I with this scars, regrets
Repent From suffering and smiling my inner child says but my suffer head damns that voice and I pamper my wounds that marriage is for better for worse.
For worse he punches me
For worse he bruises my face against the wall that I am a mistake
For worse he spits his venom on my face and forces himself just to go down with me
Me his property, me his slave
Me his bondservant, me his sexual object
A vessel to be used till I'm condemned
I'm abused but the street says he paid your dowry
In pains but they say make I fear what dem say dem say go say
Run away and be tagged a prostitute,
Jezebel of your time
remain here and die a victim

What if all I have is to give up
What if all I have is to say I’m tired
What if I all I have is to be selfish, go back to ile baba mie and pickup by book, chase a dream, have a life that is not this life
Cause this life is suffering and hell wrap in martial vows
This life is a chisel stuck in between the woods I can’t go back and I can’t go further
This life is orogbo and onugbu mixed together to create concoctions called a marriage
This is not marrital bliss it’s a horror movie ,my horror movie
Director pause let’s have a romcom
where I will be sleeping beauty where Prince Charming finds me
Where I be Cinderella and take my glass slippers far away from this man
And journey like Alice in the wonderland wonder away to be Island princess In Barbie
I know I’m in Nigeria, fairytale don’t exist
But dey say if I fast and pray he will change
Not APC change
Change and be the man I dream of

But it’s too late
I’m dropping my suicidal note
Now I know that this blood on this paper is all I have to leave as a mark to warn another girl not to take this path

If all I have was a story
Then this would be is all I have